Small Groups 101

GOAL OF A SMALL GROUP:
- Help students understand the topics discussed on Sunday morning better by being able to talk and process questions related to the topic.
- Have students come up with and discuss their thoughts to the questions.
- Provide a fun, yet God focused environment, where students can discover God on a deeper level.
- Building deeper relationships with students with God at the center.

How not to lead a Small Group: (not to start out too negative!)

-***Don’t be too Talkative***
Here is the deal, students sit and listen to adults all the time! Small group is a place for them to talk, share their ideas and thoughts. If you start the group by talking a lot, the students won’t share. If you are talking more than 10% of the time…zip it! =)

-Don’t be Insecure
I know that you think you are too old and dorky to have teenagers think you are cool. (if you don’t…tell me your secret!) But the bottom line is, God has called you to this ministry! Your love, listening year and interest are all students are looking for.

-Don’t be Unprepared
Students are taking the time out of their busy lives to show up…let them know that you value them enough to be prepared for your time.

-Don’t be Inflexible
Leave those control freak tendencies at home! Rigidity, rules, strictness = School

-Don’t be too Flexible
Student’s hang out with their friends all the time, small group can’t just be hang out. We need to have content! We are sheperding students into the Kingdom! Let’s make sure that our small group times are fun, silly, goofy, flexible but at the core about Christ.


-Don’t get Walked on
You aren’t the teacher of a class, but a facilitor of conversation…but you are the adult in the group! Don’t let students push you around. If you have problems with a student talk to Christina or Drew.

How to Lead a Great Discussion

-Encourage your students to verbalize their views and feelings, however unorthodox they may be
We are going not for church answers here, let students know that they can be honest and will still be valued as a part of the small group.

-Be grateful for every answer
We want students to feel comfortable and want them to talk…even if what they say is a little off, crazy, or just dumb. I like to say “Thanks ______ for sharing your thoughts with us.”

-***Don’t be satisfied with the first response to your question***
Instead say things like, “Do you all agree with ____?” “What do other people think?” “Why do you think that?” Sometimes it is even great to play devil’s advocate!

-Keep the discussion moving
Silence is okay…but not boredom. Learn to read your group.

-Be alert to individuals in your group
Some students are silent and scared, other are bold and abrasive. We want to be aware of what students are getting interrupted and walked on, what students might need a little help to share their thoughts, and what students we need to shut up!

-***Don’t, Don’t, Don’t be afraid of silence***
If you fill is with your thoughts you are training students that small group is about you talking. They will feel awkward in silence, but it will motivate them to share. Also, what is long silence to us may not feel the same to people in our group! Some people think slower than others…give space before you ever jump in.

-Turn difficult questions back to the group
You aren’t the teacher with all the answers. When hard questions surface hand it back over by saying, “Well, what do you all think?”

-**Stay flexible to the group’s needs**
Don’t ever be too focused on the agenda to bulldoze over a students need to share, cry or be prayed for and supported right them and there. Once a question is answered don’t just move on, try to get a response out of a number of students, this will create a discussion. Also, if students come to group saying that some crisis or big thing has happened at school or in the world (example: a teacher got fired for sleeping with a student, a shooting at a school in the country, parents that just announced a divorce…) through your agenda out the window and care for that need right then and there! This does not apply to teenage drama (breakups, fights, stress of schoolwork…) Drama can be handled one on one with students, not using the whole groups time.

-Be prepared to learn from your group
You will be amazed at what students have to teach you! Be open-minded, be a good listener, be slow to speak and judge, try to put yourself into their world and feelings.

How to Ask Questions that get Responses

-Avoid yes or no questions
-Don’t ask questions that assume an answer (or leading questions)
-Ask questions that are relevant to our students
-Learn how and when to ask direct questions
-Ask questions that deal with feelings as well as facts


MAPS
Meaningful God centered conversations
Accountability
Prayer
Scripture